HABIT 5, LESSON 4

One Another

PURSUE “ONE ANOTHER” RELATIONSHIPS in the church.
It’s easy to think of church as a Sunday worship service. As we discussed in the previous lesson, worship services are important. But the church is also a lot more.
The church is a community and a family in which we get to follow the “one another” commands of Scripture.

LOVE

John 13:34
A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another.
John 13:35
By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.
John 15:12
This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you.
John 15:17
These things I command you, so that you will love one another.
Romans 12:10
Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honor.
Romans 16:16
Greet one another with a holy kiss.
1 Corinthians 16:20
Greet one another with a holy kiss.
2 Corinthians 13:12
Greet one another with a holy kiss.
Galatians 5:26
Let us not become conceited, provoking one another, envying one another.
Galatians 6:2
Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.
1 Peter 4:8
Above all, keep loving one another earnestly, since love covers a multitude of sins.
1 Peter 5:14
Greet one another with the kiss of love. Peace to all of you who are in Christ.
1 John 3:11
For this is the message that you have heard from the beginning, that we should love one another.
1 John 3:23
And this is his commandment, that we believe in the name of his Son Jesus Christ and love one another, just as he has commanded us.
1 John 4:7
Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God, and whoever loves has been born of God and knows God.
1 John 4:11
Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another.
1 John 4:12
No one has ever seen God; if we love one another, God abides in us and his love is perfected in us.
2 John 5
And now I ask you, dear lady—not as though I were writing you a new commandment, but the one we have had from the beginning—that we love one another.

SERVE

John 13:14
If I then, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also ought to wash one another’s feet.
Romans 15:14
I myself am satisfied about you, my brothers, that you yourselves are full of goodness, filled with all knowledge and able to instruct one another.
Galatians 5:13
For you were called to freedom, brothers. Only do not use your freedom as an opportunity for the flesh, but through love serve one another.
Ephesians 5:19
… addressing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody to the Lord with your heart …
Colossians 3:16
Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly, teaching and admonishing one another in all wisdom, singing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, with thankfulness in your hearts to God.
1 Peter 4:9
Show hospitality to one another without grumbling.
1 Peter 4:10
As each has received a gift, use it to serve one another, as good stewards of God’s varied grace.

PROMOTE UNITY

Romans 12:16
Live in harmony with one another. Do not be haughty, but associate with the lowly. Never be wise in your own sight.
Romans 14:13
Therefore let us not pass judgment on one another any longer, but rather decide never to put a stumbling block or hindrance in the way of a brother.
Romans 15:5
May the God of endurance and encouragement grant you to live in such harmony with one another, in accord with Christ Jesus.
Romans 15:7
Therefore welcome one another as Christ has welcomed you, for the glory of God.
1 Corinthians 11:33
So then, my brothers, when you come together to eat, wait for one another.
2 Corinthians 13:11
Finally, brothers, rejoice. Aim for restoration, comfort one another, agree with one another, live in peace; and the God of love and peace will be with you.
Ephesians 4:2
… with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love …
Ephesians 4:32
Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.
Ephesians 5:21
… submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ.
Colossians 3:9
Do not lie to one another, seeing that you have put off the old self with its practices.
Colossians 3:13
… bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive.
1 Peter 5:5
Likewise, you who are younger, be subject to the elders. Clothe yourselves, all of you, with humility toward one another, for “God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.”

ENCOURAGE

1 Thessalonians 4:18
Therefore encourage one another with these words.
1 Thessalonians 5:11
Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing.
Hebrews 3:13
But exhort one another every day, as long as it is called “today,” that none of you may be hardened by the deceitfulness of sin.
Hebrews 10:24
And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works …
Hebrews 10:25
… not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near.

AVOID SINNING AGAINST ONE ANOTHER

1 Thessalonians 5:15
See that no one repays anyone evil for evil, but always seek to do good to one another and to everyone.
James 4:11
Do not speak evil against one another, brothers. The one who speaks against a brother or judges his brother, speaks evil against the law and judges the law. But if you judge the law, you are not a doer of the law but a judge.
James 5:9
Do not grumble against one another, brothers, so that you may not be judged; behold, the Judge is standing at the door.

CONFESS SIN

James 5:16
Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working.

These commands necessitate relationships in which we intentionally serve each other. We need others, and they need us as well.
The goal for all of us should be to mentor and disciple others, helping them to grow. A good way to start is to practice the “one another” commands. Most of us feel inadequate to mentor others, but, with God’s help, all of us can obey these commands. Look for a person or group of people, and get started.
The best place for this to happen is in small gatherings, often called small groups. It’s where we switch from sitting in rows to sitting in circles. We begin to open our lives, to serve others, and to allow others to serve as well.
Obeying the one-another commands of Scripture is essential to the Christian life.

BIBLICAL COMMUNITY IS INVITING AND SCARY

Obeying these commands is both inviting and scary at the same time.
It’s inviting, because we all want relationships like this. We want to be known, loved, encouraged, supported, prayed for, received, and forgiven. When we experience these kinds of relationships, we feel alive. It feels like we could meet any challenge. We feel safe.
This is exactly what church should be like: a place where everyone is welcomed, warmly greeted, and loved.
But it’s also scary. Being known means dropping the mask. It means letting people into our lives, including the messy parts. It also means loving, encouraging, supporting, and praying for others. It’s inconvenient, and it takes time.
These kinds of relationships also involve risk. What if we open ourselves up, and we’re disappointed? The truth is that this will probably happen. Pursue this kind of relationship anyway. It’s worth the inconvenience and the possibility—even likelihood—of getting hurt.
Larry Crabb describes what this can look like:

When members of a spiritual community reach a sacred place of vulnerability and authenticity, something is released. Something good begins to happen. An appetite for holy things is stirred. For just a moment, the longing to know God becomes intense, stronger than all other passions, worth whatever price must be paid for it. Spiritual togetherness, what I call connecting, creates movement: Togetherness in Christ encourages movement toward Christ.

FOR TODAY

Most churches include small gatherings as part of their ministry. They may be called by different names (life groups or community groups, for instance). They are great opportunities to practice the “one another” commands.

• If you are part of a small gathering that practices these “one another” commands, well done! Take a small step to live out a “one another” command with someone in your group today.
• If you are part of a church but haven’t joined a small gathering, find out how you can join one. Visit the church website to see if they have small groups available, or contact the church to find out how to join one.
• If you aren’t part of a church, then look for a church that has the essential qualities of a good church (see Habit 5, Lesson 2) and offers small groups.

Reflect and Respond

REVIEW

Church is …

• a total identity that is ours in Christ
• a community and family
• intentional relationships in which we live out “one another” commands
• where we are known, loved, encouraged, supported, prayed for, received, forgiven
• inconvenient, time-consuming, at times disappointing and painful, but always worth it

Some “one another” commands:

• Greet one another (Rom. 16:16)
• Encourage one another (1 Thess. 4:18)
• Forgive one another (Col. 3:13)
• Build one another up (1 Thess. 5:11)
• Serve one another (Gal. 5:13)
• Love one another (John 13:34)
• Bear one another’s burdens (Gal. 6:2)
• Encourage one another (Heb. 10:25)
• Meet with one another (Heb. 10:25)
• Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another (Eph. 4:32)
• Welcome one another (Rom. 15:7)
• Care for one another (1 Cor. 12:25)
• Show hospitality to one another (1 Peter 4:9)
• Pray for one another (James 5:16)
• Confess your sins to one another (James 5:16)

CONSIDER

Which “one another” command is most challenging for you to do?
Which of the “one another” commands is hard for you to receive from someone else?

DISCUSS

Have you ever experienced a community where the “one another” commands of Scripture were practiced?
If you’re not part of a small gathering of believers, what steps can you take to join one?
What small step can you take to practice a “one another” command today?

8HFG-5d