Reading 1 Corinthians feels like watching Paul take the Corinthians on a walk through their problems and we’re just along for the ride. It’s similar to taking a guided tour through an art museum. The guide plants you in front of painting after painting, pointing out different things you might not have noticed on your own.
So far, Paul’s discussed several areas where the Corinthians were messing up— leadership, sexuality, and lawsuits. Though Paul’s talking about ancient problems in an ancient church, their issues are similar—if not the same—to the ones we experience today.
The same goes for this week’s chapter. Paul will ask us to reassess how we approach our romantic relationships—whether we’re single, married, widowed, divorced, or engaged. The bottom line is that romance and relationships were never meant to satisfy us. We have much, much more to live for. We can be faithful to God where he’s placed us while also being hopeful for the future. And that’s what we’ll be talking about in this week’s trek through 1 Corinthians 7.
We grow up always looking for what’s next. It starts in grade school. We long for next year’s teacher or a locker or graduation. Then we look forward to getting a degree, finding a spouse, or having kids. It’s easy to be dissatisfied with where we are right now.
Chapter 7 is about marriage, singleness, and everything in between. Paul wants the Corinthians to apply the selfless Christian life to their relationships. He tackles the desire we all have to obsess over what’s coming instead of what’s in front of us.
Before we dive into this chapter, take a few minutes to reflect on your current life stage, specifically when it comes to romantic relationships.
Are you single? Married? Divorced? Widowed? Would you say you’re happy with your relationship status?
What’s most difficult about where you are right now? The most exciting?
With your answer in mind, grab your Bible and read all of 1 Corinthians 7. While you’re reading, jot down any observations you make about your current life stage. Write down any questions you might have about those verses.
1 Now regarding the questions you asked in your letter. Yes, it is good to abstain from sexual relations. 2 But because there is so much sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife, and each woman should have her own husband.
3 The husband should fulfill his wife’s sexual needs, and the wife should fulfill her husband’s needs. 4 The wife gives authority over her body to her husband, and the husband gives authority over his body to his wife.
5 Do not deprive each other of sexual relations, unless you both agree to refrain from sexual intimacy for a limited time so you can give yourselves more completely to prayer. Afterward, you should come together again so that Satan won’t be able to tempt you because of your lack of self-control. 6 I say this as a concession, not as a command. 7 But I wish everyone were single, just as I am. Yet each person has a special gift from God, of one kind or another.
8 So I say to those who aren’t married and to widows—it’s better to stay unmarried, just as I am. 9 But if they can’t control themselves, they should go ahead and marry. It’s better to marry than to burn with lust.
10 But for those who are married, I have a command that comes not from me, but from the Lord. A wife must not leave her husband. 11 But if she does leave him, let her remain single or else be reconciled to him. And the husband must not leave his wife.
12 Now, I will speak to the rest of you, though I do not have a direct command from the Lord. If a fellow believer has a wife who is not a believer and she is willing to continue living with him, he must not leave her. 13 And if a believing woman has a husband who is not a believer and he is willing to continue living with her, she must not leave him. 14 For the believing wife brings holiness to her marriage, and the believing husband brings holiness to his marriage. Otherwise, your children would not be holy, but now they are holy. 15 (But if the husband or wife who isn’t a believer insists on leaving, let them go. In such cases the believing husband or wife is no longer bound to the other, for God has called you to live in peace.) 16 Don’t you wives realize that your husbands might be saved because of you? And don’t you husbands realize that your wives might be saved because of you?
17 Each of you should continue to live in whatever situation the Lord has placed you, and remain as you were when God first called you. This is my rule for all the churches. 18 For instance, a man who was circumcised before he became a believer should not try to reverse it. And the man who was uncircumcised when he became a believer should not be circumcised now. 19 For it makes no difference whether or not a man has been circumcised. The important thing is to keep God’s commandments.
20 Yes, each of you should remain as you were when God called you. 21 Are you a slave? Don’t let that worry you—but if you get a chance to be free, take it. 22 And remember, if you were a slave when the Lord called you, you are now free in the Lord. And if you were free when the Lord called you, you are now a slave of Christ. 23 God paid a high price for you, so don’t be enslaved by the world. 24 Each of you, dear brothers and sisters, should remain as you were when God first called you.
25 Now regarding your question about the young women who are not yet married. I do not have a command from the Lord for them. But the Lord in his mercy has given me wisdom that can be trusted, and I will share it with you. 26 Because of the present crisis, I think it is best to remain as you are. 27 If you have a wife, do not seek to end the marriage. If you do not have a wife, do not seek to get married. 28 But if you do get married, it is not a sin. And if a young woman gets married, it is not a sin. However, those who get married at this time will have troubles, and I am trying to spare you those problems.
29 But let me say this, dear brothers and sisters: The time that remains is very short. So from now on, those with wives should not focus only on their marriage. 30 Those who weep or who rejoice or who buy things should not be absorbed by their weeping or their joy or their possessions. 31 Those who use the things of the world should not become attached to them. For this world as we know it will soon pass away.
32 I want you to be free from the concerns of this life. An unmarried man can spend his time doing the Lord’s work and thinking how to please him. 33 But a married man has to think about his earthly responsibilities and how to please his wife. 34 His interests are divided. In the same way, a woman who is no longer married or has never been married can be devoted to the Lord and holy in body and in spirit. But a married woman has to think about her earthly responsibilities and how to please her husband. 35 I am saying this for your benefit, not to place restrictions on you. I want you to do whatever will help you serve the Lord best, with as few distractions as possible.
36 But if a man thinks that he’s treating his fiancée improperly and will inevitably give in to his passion, let him marry her as he wishes. It is not a sin. 37 But if he has decided firmly not to marry and there is no urgency and he can control his passion, he does well not to marry. 38 So the person who marries his fiancée does well, and the person who doesn’t marry does even better.
39 A wife is bound to her husband as long as he lives. If her husband dies, she is free to marry anyone she wishes, but only if he loves the Lord. 40 But in my opinion it would be better for her to stay single, and I think I am giving you counsel from God’s Spirit when I say this.
1 Corinthians 7 (NLT)
Yesterday in the message, we hit on our big idea for this chapter: Keep Your Station.
In other words, live faithfully in the life stage God’s placed you in. That’s what we’re going to unpack in the next four days— what it means to be present and others-focused wherever God’s placed us.
There’s a lot to cover in these forty verses. No matter if you’re married or single, there’s something for you in this chapter. If your questions don’t get answered through this week’s study, talk with a trusted Christian friend or pastor. But let’s start with this:
If you can ask God one of your questions about relationships (single, married, divorced, widowed, etc), what would you ask?
Text your response to the above prompting questions to your group and/or share it as a comment below
After today’s reading a question I would ask God is a question about singleness. My question is to know when the right time to date is and how do you know personally if you are ready to date.
In yesterday’s sermon & in today’s passage, I see that relationships should be others-focused & God centered versus self-centered. Paul shares that it is better to be single & content with where God has placed us. When we’re single we can devote ourselves to God and serve Him without distractions & without the added responsibilities of caring for our partner. There are also wrong reasons to be single that is selfish as well, such as “working on myself, for myself, by myself”. My question for God would be how can someone shift their perspective of being selfishly single to a healthy, others-focused, God-centered season of singleness? What would that look like?
If I could ask God one question about relationships, I would ask if I was being a good husband to my wife and if I was not, what I could do to change that. I try to do my best that I can but sometimes we can be blinded and not realize that there may be something we are doing wrong or something we can be better at doing. I think sometimes we get satisfied when we reach a certain stage of life and we get too complacent in our comfort. I think to be good stewards of the things God has given us, we must continually strive to be good stewards. It is something that never ends until the day we are reunited with God